Through the years in sobriety I have changed direction a time or two with the service work I participate in. I started at one homegroup, young in sobriety I greeted, led the newcomers meetings, chaired meetings, led discussions, then became a co-chair of the Newcomers Committee. It got to a point where I felt like I needed a spiritual boost, my growth had been stunted, and I needed to do something different. Don’t get me wrong, it is an amazing homegroup and was the perfect place for a new woman in sobriety.

But when you have that gut feeling, you probably need to make a change. I moved to a different homegroup and continued serving, because that is what we are supposed to do, after all. I was sponsoring other women, chairing meetings, was the Chair Person and Secretary for our business meetings, led discussions, and spoke wherever I was asked. I still do these things today. This again, was another change that I needed at the time.

But then I needed something more. Us alcoholics, always need MORE. So I went a little further and started bringing meetings into the women’s jail and the detox facility and suddenly felt fulfilled. These volunteer jobs have been the most amazing experiences that I have been able to participate in. I think perhaps, I have finally found my calling, my passion. Isn’t that what we look for our entire lives? Something that we get to be involved in on a regular basis, AND it can actually be something that we love and are passionate about. That is truly something special.

Why am I writing about this tonight? Well, because I just came from bringing a meeting into a detox facility. Tonight was particularly meaningful because I got to do this for the first time as a leader of the meeting, and 2 newly sober women came with me. One, who I met that night, about 3 months sober, and the other, my newest sponsee, a few days sober. I love being able to experience bringing meetings into places like that, but I especially doing it with newly sober women who have never experienced that before. To see the light come on in people’s eyes, to be part of a first experience like that, is truly a magical thing. I can appreciate where I came from and I pray the women who were with me tonight, could have that same appreciation. It can be an easy thing to forget, even when we are just a few days sober. I have learned that with these activities, not only do I get to try to help others, but it also keeps it green for me. It gives me a reminder of where I used to be and where I most certainly don’t want to go back to, just for today.

I find this particularly moving, because all I can think about is where I was a little over 5 years ago, in that exact same spot. Never did I think that I would be helping people in this way. When I was out there drinking, I wouldn’t help anyone. I was selfish and self centered and it didn’t even cross my mind that other people needed help. I was the only one that mattered. That’s what drinking will do to you. It hides our innermost self. I thank God I get to be the true person that God wants me to be today. Is it work to be selfless, God centered, looking for the next person to help, and constantly taking action to enlarge my spiritual life? Of course it is. But I can without a doubt say how worth it, it truly is. It’s the best “high” I have ever had. A high that drugs and alcohol couldn’t even touch.